If you truly want to change your life and the way you act and behave, start owning your pain. Start fully making your pain as part of yourself. Stop the separation and own what you feel. Admit to it, be honest and then use any kind of practice that helps you to let go of what you feel. If you want to learn more about emotions and how to let go of them, read the article How to Let go- The Only Technique You Will Ever Need.